The terrible truth
“… with a lighter”
Within less than 24 hours, I had two statements, one contradicting the other. The Sacristan told me that the lamp ‘is placed unlit,’ and the Patriarch assured me that it ‘is placed lit.’ One of the two was not telling the truth. But who, and more importantly, why? The Elder Sacristan’s claim had been verified by the ‘experiment.’ On the other hand, it seemed inconceivable to me that the Patriarch would lie. What would prevent him from saying it is placed unlit, without then having to say all those incomprehensible things? ‘It is placed unlit, and I find it unlit.’ This position is logical, regardless of how it is subsequently lit.
Why did he choose the logical version of the ‘lit lamp,’ combined with the absurd claim that ‘I find it unlit’? And after all, if a ‘lit lamp’ that then extinguishes itself and subsequently lights up again is not a miracle, and indeed a double one (miraculous extinguishing-miraculous lighting), then what is it?
Before leaving the Patriarchate, I asked to see Isidore again. I was determined to solve the mystery that day. I was already exhausted from lack of sleep, and my head was throbbing from a headache, probably for the same reason. The appointment was set almost immediately. I ran down the alley leading to the Church of the Holy Sepulchre. Archbishop Isidore was waiting for me in the courtyard. ‘I won’t keep you long; I only have one question for you, but somewhere quiet.’ ‘Let’s go to my office,’ he told me.
The sacristan’s office is in the first ground-floor room, to the right upon entering the church. I was not in the mood for pleasantries or diplomatic maneuvers – I was seething inside. “Your Eminence, yesterday you told me that the vigil lamp is brought in unlit, and it is true, I was convinced that this is the case. However, you avoided telling me clearly how the Patriarch’s candles are lit.” “I explained to you that from a theological point of view, the ‘miracle’ can be disputed, but I believe in it.”
‘Your Eminence, you maintain that the lamp is placed unlit. Correct?’ ‘Correct.’ ‘Only the Patriarch disagrees. I met him a short while ago, and he told me it is placed lit. As you understand, only one of the two can be true.’ It was a very difficult moment for me – as I was sure I would put him in an awkward position – and for him. ‘I have nothing more to tell you beyond what I have already said.’ I had no other option. ‘I am sorry, Your Eminence, but one of you is lying.’
Silence. No reaction. We stood looking at each other. ‘Your Eminence, do you understand my concern or not?’ ‘I understand you.’ ‘Then, I earnestly ask you, tell me, which of the two is true?’
He rose from his chair, took two steps, and returned, remaining standing. ‘Look, I respect His Beatitude’s position, but he cannot be unaware of how the lamp is placed in the Holy Sepulchre. He himself served as Sacristan.’ 1
Oh my God, what am I hearing, I thought. ‘So? Are you saying it is placed unlit and the Patriarch knows it!?’ ‘I believe I have answered you.’ ‘Right, you have answered me…’ I stammered awkwardly. Isidore sat back down in the chair. I was trembling.
The entire journey, all the research, all the time I dedicated to this matter, everything hinged on the next few minutes. ‘You told me that the lamp is placed unlit, and the Patriarch also knows this. So far, so good. Then how are the Patriarch’s candles lit from an unlit lamp? Where does the Holy Fire come from?’
Silence.
‘Your Eminence, you must answer me.’
Silence.
‘Your Eminence, please tell me, what Christian logic dictates that you should let a person be tormented by a “miracle” which, however, “from a theological perspective is not a miracle,” as you said? When did Christ teach that we should refuse to tell the truth to someone who seeks it?’
He rose from his chair again and paced back and forth twice. He stopped in front of his desk, placed his hands on it, and sat down again. I was certain that the then forty-five-year-old hierarch, consistent with Christian ethics and the ninth commandment –Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour– would eventually tell me the truth:
‘Listen. The lamp is placed unlit by me; the whole world sees it on their television. But when the Patriarch enters the Holy Sepulchre, he finds it lit…’ He wanted to continue, but I interrupted him – such was the intensity I felt. ‘How is that possible? How can this happen? Who lights it?’ My loud voice was followed by an almost whisper: ‘I light it…’ I interrupted him again with the most foolish question a person can ask: ‘How? In what way?’ The answer had a tone of crushing defeat: ‘With a lighter, what else?’
Silence.
The scene was dramatic. He looked at me, and I looked at him – both petrified. I noticed his eyes were moist, teary. Strange. I didn’t feel I had achieved any triumph, any victory. I was prepared for everything, but not for this. My soul had dried up. Instinctively, I reached out my hand and gently patted his shoulder twice. As if he were an old friend. As if I were telling him: ‘You honor the cassock you wear. Truly, you are honest and brave.’
Before opening the door to leave, I turned abruptly, as a thought flashed through my mind: ‘Wait a minute. Is all this written down somewhere?’ His voice was barely audible: ‘No, nowhere.’ ‘And if something happens to you, we are mortal, how will the secret be passed on to the next Sacristan?’ ‘Although the position is currently vacant, there is also the Parasacristan of the Church of the Holy Sepulchre who knows it. Some others know it too… It goes without saying that the Patriarch also knows it.’
- Indeed. As stated in his biography, posted on the Patriarchate’s website, Theophilos was appointed Geron Skevophylax in September 2004. He remained in this position until his election as Patriarch in August 2005. ↩︎